SPACE…. The Final Frontier

Living in a college setting I have learned very quickly that one aspect that all relationships need is space. There comes a point that spending too much time with one person will drive someone crazy. In every relationship one person always seems to need more space than the other and that is when the problem originally starts. I am that person and personally the fact that I like my space has nothing to do with the person I am with… its simply my personality. No matter who it is there comes a point that I spend to much time with them and I begin to be annoyed… if not by the little things then it is just them in general. But when given a couple days, those hateful thoughts that were at once in my head… disappear as if they were never there in the first place. However the stereotypical girl tends to fall victim to the other side of the argument. She personally finds it hard to give her boyfriend space, mainly because she enjoys his company so much that she feels the need to be around him as much as possible. So.. countless times they end up getting arguments about how he would like more space and she never gives it to him… ITS NEVERENDING… because they are two different personalities who want two different things.
As written in Men are From Mars Women are from Venus, John Gray explains that women tend to be the ones who are more needy and want to spend the maximum amount of time with that special someone, where as men enjoy a certain amount of time but there comes a point when it is too much and at that point they tend to push people away.
So how do you find that compromise in terms of space? Gray writes that first there has to be understanding on both ends, being able to understand how the other person in the relationship feels is very important. For example, me being the person who enjoys my space… I would have to understand that my partner wants to spend as much time possible because he enjoys it, which is kinda flattering when you think about it. But.. on the other hand he would have to understand that spending too much time with me makes me feel smothered at times which is why I need my space. By understanding each others point of views it can be easier to make a compromise in a relationship. He writes “There is a happy medium that can be reached in the majority of cases. It is just finding it that can sometimes be the challenge.”

For more info on the book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" http://home.marsvenus.com/